<< A man was brought to Mercy Hospital, and went in for heart surgery. The operation went well, and as the groggy man regained consciousness, he was reassured by a Sister of Mercy waiting by his bed. "Mr. Smith, you're going to be just fine," the nun said while patting his hand. "We do have to know,
however, how you intend to pay for your stay here. Are you covered by insurance?" "No, I'm not," the man whispered hoarsely.
"Can you pay in cash?" "I'm afraid I can't, Sister." "Do you have any close relatives, then?" "Just my sister in New Mexico," replied the man, "but she's a spinster nun." "Nuns are not spinsters, Mr. Smith," the nun replied. "They are married to God."
"Okay," the man said with a smile, "then send the bill to my brother-in-law."
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however, how you intend to pay for your stay here. Are you covered by insurance?" "No, I'm not," the man whispered hoarsely.
"Can you pay in cash?" "I'm afraid I can't, Sister." "Do you have any close relatives, then?" "Just my sister in New Mexico," replied the man, "but she's a spinster nun." "Nuns are not spinsters, Mr. Smith," the nun replied. "They are married to God."
"Okay," the man said with a smile, "then send the bill to my brother-in-law."
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Subject: A MORNING AWAKENING
An elderly couple are both lying in bed one morning, having just awakened from a good nights sleep. He takes her hand and she responds, "Don't touch me".
"Why not," he asks.
She answers back, "Because I'm dead."
The husband says to her, "What are you talking about?
We're both lying here in bed together and talking to one another."
The wife says, "No, I'm definitely dead."
Her husband insists, "You're not dead. What in the world makes you think you're dead?"
His wife answers, "I know I'm dead, because I woke up this morning and nothing hurts."