A tale from the control tower at Dublin Airport :

As they approached Dublin number 1 runway, the tower heard the slurred words of a drunken pilot and co-pilot:

PILOT - Bjeesus will ya look how shart dat runway is?
CO-PILOT - Yer nat kiddin, Paddy.
PILOT - Dis is ganna be one a de trickiest landings ever, Shamus.
CO-PILOT - Yer nat kiddin, Paddy !!
PILOT - Right, Shamus, when I say 'go' put de engine in reverse !!
CO-PILOT - Royt, I'll do dat !!

PILOT - An den ya put de flaps down !!
CO-PILOT - Royt, I'll do dat, too !!
PILOT - An den stamp an der brakes as hard as yer can an pray ta de Holy Mudder a Gad !!!
CO-PILOT - I'm prayin already, but I'll hit de brakes as hard as I can.
So, as the wheels hit the ground, Shamus put the engines in reverse, put the flaps down, stamped on the brakes and continued to pray to the
Holy Mother with all his soul.
The brakes screeched, the tyres squealed, and there was smoke
everywhere.
But, to the relief of all the passengers, and, not least of all,
Paddy and Shamus, the aircraft came to a stop but a few meters
from the end of the runway!!!
As Paddy and Shamus sat in the cockpit regaining some composure, Paddy looked out of the window and said to Shamus,
"Dat has gat ta be de
shartist runway in de world!"

Shamus replied, "Yes, but da ya see how wide it is?"